Wilkerson Cut

In a surprising move, OF Brad Wilkerson was cut yesterday from Vinnies Pizzeria after leading the known universe in strikeouts. The leadoff hitter, considered to be a key component of the new look VP offense, faltered early and often in his comical attempts to lay wood on ball. After being informed of the team's decision, Wilkerson took his frustrations out on the locker room. In addition to tossing several water bottles across the room, he picked up a bat and ironically managed to connect with several lockers, prompting teammate Carlos Lee to quip, "It's a good thing those lockers didn't throw him a changeup." General Manager Aiello, who broke the news to Wilkerson, had this to say: "Brad's a good kid. I'm sure he'll catch on somewhere, but I can get a monkey to strike out 4 times a game." As if on cue, this statement was followed by the sight of replacement OF Jason Michaels settling in to his new locker.